Six credits. It is you I take lightly. SPOCK: That is illogical, Ensign. twelve hours later, each of the eleven tribbles produce ten, making the count 110 babies. (The pretty lady in yellow brings our group their drinks.) Much of Koloth's early career was unknown. The Real Ghostbusters “Adventures in Slime and Space” Script. KOLOTH: Yes? KIRK: And this is my first officer Mister Spock. UHURA [OC]: Captain Kirk! pile of tribbles.) SCOTT: But, Captain. The Real Ghostbusters “The Hole in the Wall Gang” Script. To whom are you referring? GUARD: Yes, sir. I can't understand it. MCCOY: You noticed that, huh? Mister Baris, they like you. darling around, you won't be able to keep up with them. "Aye." KIRK: I get the picture, Scotty. "It was invented by a little old lady from Leningrad. BARIS: But he is after my grain! Exactly 50 years ago today, the most famous Star Trek episode of all time — “The Trouble With Tribbles” — aired on for the first time. UHURA [OC]: Enterprise here. CHEKOV: Main phasers armed and ready, sir. UHURA: Well, all right, Doctor, but if you're going to dissect it, I SCOTT: No, sir. Now you BARIS: I did not misuse the Priority One channel. Koloth demands that Kirk issue an official apology to the Klingon High Command, though Baris says that would give the Klingons the wedge they need to claim Sherman's Planet. Because his typewriter used a less common, smaller size font, an approved screenplay version needed to be reduced by twenty pages before filming. Now if you'll excuse me. The Sherman's LURRY: Captain Kirk, this is Nilz Baris. State the KIRK: And the tribbles had nothing to do with it? What's quadrotriticale? KIRK: And in the storage compartments. DARVIN: I don't know. whistling.) SPOCK: Based on computer analysis, of course, taking into account the Kirk tells crewmembers beaming over to shore leave on K-7 to avoid trouble with the Klingons. Around stardate 4523.3, Koloth … tribble. Using the seemingly harmless tribbles, Darvin attempts to destroy Kirk - but for the misplaced residents of Deep Space Nine TM, saving the original Enterprise will be nothing but "tribble." This is my chicken sandwich and groups. litter of ten, producing a new generation every twelve hours over a A dispute over control of a planet brings the Enterprise to a space station, where they must deal with Klingons, edgy Federation officials, and a previously-unknown species of small, unbearably cute, voraciously hungry, and rapidly-multiplying furry creatures. The virus turns into an Then Baris confronts Kirk on the insufficient security detail for the quadrotriticale. Mister Chekov, SPOCK: They do have one redeeming characteristic. winning of this planet is the grain quadrotriticale. Sherman's Planet is claimed by both sides, our Take them away. I must be tending my ship. UHURA: Oh, it's purring. I'm waiting. In sickbay, Spock and McCoy have a characteristic debate on the aesthetics and utility of tribbles, Spock in particular, notes to McCoy their one redeeming characteristic – they do not talk too much. Half the quadrant knows it. KIRK: You threw the first punch. It's a Russian invention. JONES: Of course. I think of this project as very important. That does open, and a whole load of tribbles fall out, burying It's not worth fighting for. And second …" (A tribble lands on Kirk's head) "… close that door. SPOCK: (stroking a tribble) A most curious creature, Captain. I meant to say that it should be hauled away as garbage. UHURA: If you're not going to take him, I'm going to take him. KIRK: Why not? That's assuming one tribble, multiplying with an average nothing. KIRK: There is one thing you can do. JONES: It's only saying that it likes you. Unfortunately, disrupting a space station is not an offence. They're And I assure you, for every man you bring The Real Ghostbusters 2-Pack. (takes him aside) Look, I It's been impregnated with a virus. UHURA: Captain, I have Mister Lurry. catch up on my technical journals. KOLOTH: Captain Kirk, before you go on, may I make a request? experience and knowledge. Two security men leave and Jones enters, need to claim Sherman's Planet. So what? SPOCK: Fascinating. UHURA [OC]: Yes, Captain. K7 has issued a priority one call. Montgomery Scott declines shore leave, but Kirk, concerned for him getting too wrapped up in his technical journals, orders him over to keep an eye on the others and to enjoy himself. SCOTT: They insulted us, sir. (he takes a BARMAN: That'll be ten credits. BARIS: Of course, Captain, I realise that ADMIRAL [on monitor]: Captain Kirk? Of course, that's We're beaming down. He's eating my grain. MCCOY: What's that? (The tribbles shriek, Koloth makes a hasty bow and practically runs out KORAX: You're right, I should. JONES: You're an honest man. He's out from Earth to take It's just sitting there. Baris claims Jones is "quite probably a Klingon agent," but Kirk is unconvinced by the evidence and finds that Jones has done no worse than disrupt activities on K-7, which is not unprecedented. KIRK: Now he tells me. don't want them here, but I don't have the authority to refuse. I am forced to cancel shore leave for both Beam this book into you collection as soon as possible. There is one Earthman who doesn't remind SCOTT: Take it easy, lad. KIRK: On the contrary, sir. KOLOTH: Ah, my dear Captain Kirk. Storage compartments? KOLOTH: Let me assure you that my intentions are peaceful. SPOCK: But not totally unexpected. JONES: Sir, transporting harmful animals from one planet to another is KOLOTH: Captain Kirk, there's been no formal declaration of hostilities And when they do, they Chekov. A lot of them are alive, but they won't charge of those matters. priority one distress call? overbearing, tin-plated dictator with delusions of godhood, but he's "Laddie… don't you think you should… rephrase that?" Well, Mr. Spock, I didn't know you had it in you." between the Klingon crew and members of the Enterprise crew has broken I don't want any more Spican flame gems. JONES: Captain Kirk, I'm mystified at your tone of UHURA [OC]: Sensors are picking up a Klingon battle cruiser rapidly KIRK: Kirk to Enterprise. A brilliantly clever script, outstanding performances, jaw-dropping design and effects work, ... and “The Trouble With Tribbles” was an obvious choice. Kirk summarizes. KIRK: No, you're not. "Sometimes, all they need is a title, Mr. Baris", Kirk pointedly concludes, and he and Spock return to the Enterprise. Dismissed. (Jones puts it in her hand and it starts purring) KIRK: Mister Scott? fluff.) SCOTT: Aye. JONES: (entering) Oh, excuse me. KIRK: Summoning a starship on a priority A-1 channel to guard some SCOTT: Aye. How close will we come to the Klingon outpost JONES: I'll do it. JONES: Seven and a half. I've done nothing to warrant such severe treatment. Authorise shore leave for all off-duty personnel. Can I interest you in a harmless tribble? KIRK: After they said all this, that's when you hit the Klingons? Where are the tribbles? I told you before, and I'm telling you again (The guards take Jones' tribbles from him. the men from (There are a lot more than eleven tribbles now.) KIRK: Yes, Lieutenant, what is it? Now, drink your drink. I've read about this, but I've never seen Just the station. JONES: He's only a harmless little JONES: Ah, friend. Effective immediately, you will render any aid and KIRK: Get the maintenance crew to clean up the entire ship, and then BARIS: This is my assistant Arne Darvin. Kirk: Plural of "tribble" is "tribbles," Spock. They remind me of the lilies of the BARIS: I'm certain that can be arranged, Darvin. I am Season 2, Episode 15 Production episode: 2×13 Original air date: December 29, 1967 Key points of KIRK: Yes, what is it? tribbles who are breeding. Breeding animals is not against regulations, KIRK: You know, I think I could learn to like tribbles. SPOCK: Deep Space Station K7 now within sensor And as Captain, I want One parsec from the nearest Klingon outpost (\"Close enough to smell them,\" as Chekov puts it), the post is near Sherman's Planet, which is claimed by both sides.In the Enterprise's briefing room, Captain Jam… SPOCK: We have already checked on the background of Mister Cyrano with the barman beating a retreat and Jones taking the opportunity to To protect a space station with a vital grain shipment, Kirk must deal with Federation bureaucrats, a Klingon battle cruiser and a peddler who sells furry, purring, hungry little creatures as pets. do a thing like that to me, now would you? CHEKOV [OC]: Bridge to Captain Kirk. Here. all the other food processors too. BARMAN: Done. And tribbles are not dangerous. action, I'd like to know Just what happened. The only reason those guards are The first half of the book is devoted to various story ideas that were rejected. MCCOY: And from my observations, it seems they're bisexual, reproducing must prove it can develop the planet most efficiently. frequently inundated by them, but I've trained myself to put up with Notify Mister Lurry. JONES: How sad for you, my friend. Au revoir. security guards. Aren't we? KIRK: John Burke. I should." We do not equip our ships with, how shall I say it, non-essentials. Tribbles, tribbles, tribbles. And as captain, I want two things done. CHEKOV: Oh, quadrotriticale. SCOTT: Yes, sir. KIRK: Aren't you going on shore leave, Scotty? Aye, sir. (Chekov leaps to his feet) This morning, I found out that he, I I've been running KIRK: Priority One distress call, and it's just absolutely peaceful. SCOTT: Well, sir, this was a matter of pride. (from yet another pocket, the trader pulls a what looks like a ball of JONES: If I did, what would happen to man's search for knowledge? SPOCK: What is that, Doctor? I've never seen them act this SCOTT: Uh, no, thanks. Enterprise. Why do directors make the choices they make? KOLOTH: Of course. Lieutenant Uhura, break subspace silence. (If you're the only person in the universe who is reading this and does not know about the Trouble With Tribbles, click the link and learn) [Medical lab] (McCoy is examining a pink tribble) [Briefing room] MCCOY: Jim, Cyrano Jones is right. Nothing could get in. only breeding dangerous ones. down. Tribble reproduction is exponential, starting when one tribble makes ten. nice, soft, and furry, and they make a pleasant sound. Planet affair is of extreme importance to the Federation. BARMAN: In fact, I'll sell you this one. SPOCK: Seventeen point nine, to be exact. SPOCK: Undeveloped. I meant to say that it should be hauled away UHURA: Aye, aye. CHEKOV: I don't know, sir. Then he notices that there are fluffy balls everywhere.) KIRK: Mister Baris the fight? Kirk enter.) (But he can't open it either, so he tried one of the overhead doors That will give them the wedge they ""So would an ermine violin, Doctor, yet I see no advantage to having one. If you wish to CHEKOV: Burke, sir? devil, well that's my opinion too. battle of Donatu Five was fought near here twenty three solar years This ought to take care of it. SPOCK: Doctor? expect you to assume full responsibility for the persecution of Klingon (There are eleven fluffy tribbles of various sizes project of this importance? KIRK: Mister Spock, you've made your point. DARVIN: Quadrotriticale! Furthermore, the, Coincidentally, the episode that aired after this was ". "That is illogical, Ensign. Who put the tribbles in successfully develop Sherman's Planet. SCOTT: Aye, Captain. SCOTT: I gave them a good home, sir. KIRK: You running a nursery, Lieutenant? CHEKOV: She wants to shop, and I thought I would help her. the grain, Bones? ", "Oh…I just remembered: There is one Earth man who doesn't remind me of a Regulan bloodworm. result. (Kirk thrusts the tribbles into his Storage compartments of wheat. (storms out of the office). (He meets Baris and Darvin at the door.) one up but there's nowhere else to put it.) Captain's Log, stardate 4523.3. That's Kirk. Close enough to smell them. KORAX: No. out aboard Space Station K7. JONES: I'm sorry. face) All right, I poisoned the grain! The Enterprise crew aren't interested, and the tribbles and the Klingons react to one another with loud hostility. Mister Spock, I'll need your help. If you'll excuse me, sir. Close enough to smell them." (Kirk and Spock leave.) Come on, Spock. BARMAN: You're talking yourself out of a deal, friend. But they seem to eat a BARIS: No, Kirk. So many Tribbles! 1 Cast 1.1 Starring 1.2 Co-Starring 1.3 … CHEKOV [OC]: Aye, sir. KIRK: Go to warp factor six. KIRK: Must have been some insult. David had recently graduated from USC film school. A Regulan blood worm is soft Deep Space Station BARIS: And now Captain, I want all available security guards. DARVIN: I have nothing to say. KIRK: I see. KIRK: That's a serious charge. going to be hip deep in them. Tribbles are a fictional alien species in the Star Trek universe. DARVIN: You can't deny he's disrupted this station. your lovely self. Can I offer you a charming little tribble? defence alert? reproduction. MCCOY: How long have you had that thing, Lieutenant? JONES: Oh, yes. Kirk gets a tray from the food dispenser. DARVIN: Mister Baris is the Federation Undersecretary in Charge of ", "Do you know what you get if you feed a tribble too much?" KOLOTH: I might also add that under terms of the Organian Peace Treaty, "I was not aware, Mister Baris, that twelve Klingons constitutes a swarm. It is you I take lightly. Copyright © 1966, Present. "Oh? UHURA: Aye, sir. KIRK: You have six hours to get your ship out of Federation territory. storage compartments. (Wherever humanoids may travel, someone will set up KIRK: You issued a priority one distress call for a couple of tons of (McCoy enters, stroking a tribble.) Well, there's no accounting for taste. MCCOY: The nearest thing I can figure out is they're born pregnant, overbearing, swaggering dictator with delusions of godhood. how I maintain my stock. tribbles. KOLOTH: Captain Kirk! KIRK: Is that door secure? "Mr. your emergency? Its Well Trouble With Tribbles (downs his drink in one and heads for the door, where they meet Chekov This project is little transaction? you'll excuse me, I have a ship to tend to. As for what you want (pauses at SPOCK: Surely you must have realised what would happen if you removed JONES: Klingons. Let me try it. (the tribble is eating grain spilt from the packet Kirk gave Chekov) LURRY: Quadrotriticale is the only earth grain that grows on Sherman's David Gerrold's The Trouble with Tribbles was a favorite then, and I am happy to have it in my possession again. JONES: That's a joke. Darvin enters, and the tribbles shriek.) Original US DVD release (single-disc): Volume 21. ", "Kirk, this station is swarming with Klingons!" It was directed by Joseph Pevney with a script written by David Gerrold. KIRK: (shouting) Where? We'll beam right down. All we have to do is quit feeding Seeing as you're giving them away, can I have ", "Of course, I'd say that Captain Kirk deserves his ship. Is this off the record? the station. a few insults. KIRK: Bones, what have you got for a headache? have no teeth. Besides, tribbles MCCOY: Yes? escape. Planet. (No reply) When he sits, there is a squeak. Lieutenant Uhura reports from the bridge that K-7 has issued a Code One alert, which signals that it is under attack. In the recreation room aboard the Enterprise, Uhura's tribble gives birth to a litter. SCOTT: Aye. Avoid trouble with the Klingons. The formula for tribble reproduction is x=11. (The space station is on the main viewer, looking intact.) flying over a table. SCOTT: I did, Captain. SCOTT: Well, Captain, the Klingons called you, uh a tin-plated, UHURA: Oh, Captain. KIRK: I want to know who started it. Bones? KIRK: Who threw the first punch, Scotty? The All other copyrights MCCOY: Lieutenant, do you mind if I take one of these down to the lab (DS9: "Trials and Tribble-ations") In 2268, the Gr'oth was on a six-month mission, assigned to patrol the border of the Klingon Neutral Zone. restraining factors. They remind me of Regulan We like JONES: They do. "They do not talk too much. KIRK: Another technical journal, Scotty? KIRK: (shows Chekov the packet of wheat) Mister Chekov, what do you CHEKOV: Not everyone, Captain. Inconclusive. finer things. KIRK: You'll do it? Ah, my good friend. Story outline "A Fuzzy Thing Happened to Me": First draft teleplay "The Trouble with Tribbles": UK re-release (three-episode tapes, CIC Video): Volume 2.5. (The tribbles shriek, Koloth makes a hasty bow and practically runs out of the room with Korax.) Thanks to you, only a few weeks late. MCCOY: Yes? ", "My chicken sandwich and coffee. (There are tribbles on the walls, the floor, the He recalls working with Star Trek 's creator. “Trouble with Tribbles” Analysis. Now, if KORAX: Get out of here with that parasite. (Ten men are lined up. MCCOY: I like them better than I like you. excuse me, Captain. And beam down two, and only two, We, we really do. MCCOY: (scanning him) Heartbeat is all wrong. KIRK: is the rest of your history that faulty, Ensign? already told Mister Lurry, the purpose of my presence I thought you said tribbles liked everybody. KIRK: Pipe it down here will you, Mister Chekov. KIRK: You did, Mister Scott? ", "I gave them to the Klingons, sir." They're consuming our supplies and returning I want that grain Gerrold wrote in, Spock's estimate of how many tribbles there are in three days, dead or alive, starting with one tribble producing a litter of ten every twelve hours is exactly correct, assuming that every tribble always has a litter of ten. they starved to death. expect you or Mister Spock to know about such things, but was within the Klingon's sphere of influence less than four months ago. channel. After all, my tribbles did put you wise So he takes another out of his KIRK: I have never questioned the orders or the intelligence of any We're going in armed for battle. We quit feeding them, they stop breeding. SPOCK: Quadrotriticale is a high-yield grain, a four-lobed hybrid of packet) Wheat. LURRY [on viewscreen]: I don't think the Klingons are planning to mounts up. "That's a joke. Kirk out. McCoy reports that almost 50% of their metabolism is geared towards reproduction. Kirk orders a speed increase to warp factor 6, while Uhura initiates a red alert. KIRK: Oh, yes. going to be there, Kirk, to enjoy every minute of it. don't want to know about it. It first aired on NBC on Friday, December 29th, 1967. representative of the Federation. me of a Regulan blood worm. ... None of this is in Gerrold’s final-draft shooting script. "A fat tribble." Contact Manager Lurry and Nilz Baris. ", "I see no practical use for them. Perhaps one of you other gents? KOLOTH: Yes. You'll take full responsibility for it. thing. (However, in ", During production of the "buried in tribbles" scene, it took up to eight takes (a considerable number) to get the avalanche of tribbles to fall just right. BARMAN: That's what we're trying to decide right now. GUARD: It's not working, sir. How many of these did Uhura give you? KIRK: Does everybody know about this wheat but me? should be hauling garbage. KIRK: Well, I have the authority to act, and I'm going to use it. Ha! Meanwhile, Kirk argues with Baris about the adequacy of the security Kirk is providing, until Kirk claims he is getting a headache. "The Trouble With Tribbles" is the fifteenth episode of season two of the science fiction television series Star Trek and the forty-fourth episode of the series overall. maintain battle readiness. MCCOY: Tell him, Spock. SPOCK: Don't be insulting, Doctor. UHURA: Aye, sir. SCOTT: Captain Kirk, that'd be inhuman. enters) But they do like Vulcans. the last vacant table. KIRK: What was in the bar? The barman retreats and Jones dispenses himself some drinks in his absence. KORAX: We have been in space for five months. mean she, had had babies. SPOCK: The logical assumption is that there is something in the grain. sort of mutual understanding. We have several tons of it here on the station. Dismissed. find out anything, I'll let you know. KIRK: Scotty! Back on the Enterprise, Kirk receives an order from Starfleet Admiral Fitzpatrick to render any and or all aid that Baris may require. You get a bunch of hungry little tribbles. UHURA [OC]: This is a Red Alert. tribble hits him on the head) close that door. the distress call. development project into a total disaster. they are most efficient. My UHURA: Aye. as garbage. the storage compartment. (the men file out) Scotty, not you. JONES: Ah, friend Klingon. prevent trouble, Mister Scott. UHURA: Security, cancel Red Alert. You've treated them like KIRK: I heard you. That'll give me a chance to I want to know who threw the first punch. ", "I want these things off my ship! Scott, you didn't transport them dispute? "On the contrary, sir. CHEKOV: It was invented by a little old lady from Leningrad. JONES: Captain, you're a hard man. I want Dr. McCoy takes one of the offspring to study it. Kirk may be a swaggering, overbearing, tin-plated dictator with delusions of godhood, but he's not soft. he is also a Klingon spy. JONES: Really, Captain Kirk, I must protest this treatment. Fortunately, of course … I am immune … to its effect. BARMAN: All right. SCOTT: Why, no, sir. not soft. KIRK: Now, that's just lovely. KIRK: Mister Baris, I have guards around the grain. be for long. CHEKOV: Oh, Royal Academy. my opinion, you have taken this important project far too lightly. And I please to give it to the lovely lady. KIRK: I don't know, sir. And I am That's why He has sat on a large KIRK: All you men going on shore leave to stay in KOLOTH: An official apology addressed to the Klingon High Command. ships. SPOCK: They do not talk too much. KIRK: Too much of anything, Lieutenant, even love, isn't necessarily a (Baris leaves with the security guards and Darvin.) 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